It is very easy to please men and women by doing or saying what they want. When you do so, you receive human approval. Basically there is nothing wrong with pleasing human beings provided that you please God first by doing so. In everything we do, we should put God first. It is good to please your spouse in all essential aspects of life, doing the will of God in the process. However, if pleasing a person makes you to violate your conscience and sin against God, then refrain from doing so. Let each person search his or her conscience in line with the word of God, doing what is right and of good report.
The Social media is a good forum to interact with families, friends and acquaintances. Do we like or comment on posts because they come from our friends or because of their importance and relevance? Must you like a post only to feel bad later? Must you write another post because X or Y has reacted to it?
For the Christian, Heaven bound, we should provide for things that are honest and of good report both in the sight of God and man.
Jokes and humour can be good and healthy, but not at the expense of morality, good conscience and edification.
My father in the Lord, Very Rev Dr Mike Oye once taught us this song among very much of sound doctrine, in the very early years:
There are things non-Christians may, I cannot;
LORD make them plain.
There are things all people can, I may not;
Christ help me through;
Yet there are things non-Christians can’t do;
Only I can do;
That is praying, living daily for Christ;
That only I can do.
————–o————-
In our daily living for Christ may we be found true, faithful, diligent, loving, compassionate, considerate, bold and firm. The LORD Who called us is faithful to keep us to the end. He is our Rewarder. Abundant Grace be with you. Shalom.
Archive for the ‘On Relationship’ Category
4 Apr
Whom Are You Living To Please?
28 Nov
TOLERANCE DOES NOT CONDONE IMMORALITY OR EVIL
Tolerance does not condone immorality or evil. How about the Christian B&B Ruling: Is it fair after all? The law and legal judgements are respected because legal experts and judges are expected by God to give a good and fair representation of the mind and the law of God! Therefore judges themselves shall give account of themselves before the judgement throne of God at the end! In the light of these, nobody is excusable before God, Who is the final authority.
A gay couple is declared right over the owners of a Christian Bed and Breakfast (B&B) facility! The owners do not allow unmarried couple to sleep on double beds in their B&B facility. By Biblical standard, no gay couple is truly married, but by societal laws which oppose God, they may be called married or in the so-ca!led Civil Partnership! Is it wrong or illegal to have a B&B or hotel, run along Christian principles? Is it wrong to have a school run along religious principles? Is it wrong to have a Bank run along religious principles? Why do we have FAIR TRADE? Why do we have Islamic Banks? Why must a society force people to discard their religious views in running their business of 28years standing? Because of these immorality, and many other disobedient sinful unnatural laws and activities, the wrath of God and the wrath of nature are moving across many nations of the world today and people are asking WHY, out of ignorance?
Who is right? Is it the society or God? What is justice? Is it merely to favour a section of society against another? Everyone has a right to be treated fairly. You do not rob a person of his right in order to please another person. Tolerance is the ability to be fair and understanding to people whose ways and opinions are different from one’s own. Does that empower anyone to deliberately go to a place where the views are different from his with the purpose to impose his clearly diverge views? NO. What is religious tolerance? Is it to throw away your beliefs to favour another belief? Must a person be forced to condone views which he or she clearly knows to be evil, on the basis of his beliefs? NO. Where and what are the bases of religious freedom? What is the role of the Church in all of these? Is the Church a mere spectator in the face of these absurdities and immoralities which clearly violate the rights of others, notably Christians in this instance and go further to challenge the authentic voice of God? Each one of us shall give account to God. To Mr. Peter and Mrs. Hazelmary Bull , I say; Cheer up! If you suffer for righteousness sake, be happy and do not be afraid of any terror, neither be troubled; But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts and be ready to give an answer to every man who asks you to give reason for the hope that is in you. Only do so with meekness and fear of God. Be courageous and bold and never feel ashamed at all. At the worst you may close up the B&B, but God shall reward you. You are no losers, but winners because God is on your side[1 Peter 1:12-17].
Let the Church leaders speak out now in truth and not in hypocrisy; or keep quiet forever in failure and damnation! Enough is enough! The Church must not follow the multitude to do evil! The statutes of England and the United Kingdom still indicate Biblical Christianity! Would any leader in the Church allow the way of truth to be spoken of as if evil? When did the Church become a group of cowards? Where are the Bishops, Archbishops, Presidents, Moderators, General Secretaries, Chairmen, G.Os, Superintendents, Pastors etc? Are they hiding out of fear, timidity or nonchalance? [Read Exodus 23:1-2;Romans 1:18-32; 2 Timothy 3:1-17; 2 Peter 2:1-22; Leviticus 20:10-24]. The grace of God which now gives much room for repentance, overlooking the sins and wickedness of us human beings does not condone any act of wickedness or immorality, but it gives us second chance. The patience of God should compel all of us human beings to urgent and committed repentance. Whilst offenders may not be stoned to death or hanged today, the evils committed do not change from being less evil than in the former times. Let God be true and every person else a lair. Homosexuality has not stopped from being less evil than it was in the days of Lot, in the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah, which were destroyed because of their wickedness and sexual immoralities topped by homosexuality! Homosexuality is no less evil in the Twenty-First Century United Kingdom, United States of America, France, Germany, China, Japan, Nigeria, Ghana, Saudi Arabia, Greece, Egypt, Iraq, Australia, South Africa or Israel, or anywhere else! The selfish, partial and imperfect laws of mankind must not be allowed to underrate the Commandments of God! Cheap political gains, acclaim in the eyes of the public, flexing of muscles in financial and material wealth, good oratorical prowess, use of physical forces, use of legal powers, misuse of scientific and medical skills are no sufficient reasons or excuses to impose man-made rules against the commandments of Almighty God! Underrating the commandments of God would bring untold sorrows and hardships, both in the present and in the near future! The only escape route is GENUINE REPENTANCE!
God’s final testimony of His laws, rule, judgment, love and salvation has been revealed through Jesus Christ. Unto Jesus Christ God has committed all things. By this man, Jesus Christ, God made this world and the whole universe! He is coming back soon as King of kings and Lord of lords, to reign and rule in righteousness. It is therefore important that everyone pays close attention! Mankind disobeyed God and as a result, sickness, hardships and death came into our affairs in life. Abortive efforts were made by mankind to solve his problems. God sent prophets,through many generations in order to bring us back to himself. Mankind was still incorrigible and deviant. Finally God sent his Son Jesus into this world. He was born in such a miraculous way that he never inherited the sin nature of man. God by the power of his Spirit came upon a pure and chaste virgin called Mary,who bore the pregnancy of Jesus. Jesus was born into a humble family led by Joseph, the carpenter. He was engaged to be married to Mary, but before the nuptial knot was tied, Mary became pregnant miraculously. Through angelic visitation, Joseph was instructed and encouraged to take care of his pregnant intended wife before they were married and not to dump her secretly, as he was planning to do! Thus Jesus was born in Bethlehem under strange miraculous circumstances. He grew up in the town of Nazareth, under the parental care of Joseph and Mary.
Jesus Christ grew up, working as a carpenter and later started his ministry which brought healing, comfort, deliverance and hope to many. His teachings of truth brought him into conflict with the political and religious leaders of his days. He was arrested, wrongly accused and crucified. All those were in line with the divine plan of God to rescue mankind from eternal death and ruin. Jesus Christ by divine plan, voluntarily laid down his life through the shedding of his blood on the cross, to clean us all from sin. He rose up from the dead on the third day and is alive forever. For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life. God did not send his Son into the world to condemn it, but to save it through Jesus Christ. If you submit to Jesus, you have life, but if you reject him, you have death. The basis for judgement and death is this: Jesus is the light of the world. God made this world, man and the universe through him. People who were evil inclined hate the light. Anyone who loves the truth comes into the light, having nothing to hide, because his deeds are in harmony with God and done through his power. Anyone who believes in Jesus, the Son of God, is not condemned, but has everlasting life. He who does not believe in Jesus shall not see life, but the wrath of God is upon him, because such a person is condemned already[ John 3:16-17,18-21,35-36 ]. The power of sin and incorrigibility have been broken by Jesus Christ, through his blood shed on the cross, outside the city walls of Jerusalem, over two thousand years ago! Whosoever shall call upon the name of Jesus Christ shall be saved. The power to save mankind has been given to Jesus Christ. Come to God through Jesus now. You are not condemned unless you condemn yourself through deliberate rejection of the provision made for us all by God. That provision is JESUS CHRIST! Come to Jesus without delay. God bless you.
15 Oct
Forgiveness in Marriage
In ordinary human relationships, the issue of forgiveness is very vital for continuity. It is human to make mistakes, but that is no excuse for repetition of the same mistakes. If a person takes his or her relationship seriously, he would not indulge in causing sorrows to the other person at the expense of the continuity or stability of the relationship. In marriage, forgiveness occupies an important place. A husband and his wife interact every moment daily, throughout their life time. It is inevitable for offences to occur. However, when offences do occur, it should be handled patiently,in love and give the other person, room for correction, apologies, and improvement. Nobody should be judgemental or condemning. It is good to consider yourself, assuming you are the offender or one who made a mistake. Where there is understanding, no offence or wrong is too big to be forgiven. The peak of offence may be taken as infidelity. That, as big and horrible as it sounds and feels can yet be forgiven. Any offence that could be forgiven by God should be forgiveable by human beings.It is written: Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you[Ephesians 4:32]. Bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. And beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful[Colossians 3:13-15]. The marriage relationship does not thrive or succeed with a ‘TIT FOR TAT’ or retaliatory attitude. We should not render evil for evil or insult for insult. Rather, we should live good and peaceful lives that are harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kind and humble, blessing each other verbally and in actions[1 Peter 3:8-9]. This may not be very easy, but God gives the grace to each person to make us able. God never asks us to do what is impossible! With God, all things are possible.
12 May
Relationship With In-Laws
By in-laws we mean the parents, siblings, and both close as well as distant family members of your spouse. In most parts of the Western world, especially in the United Kingdom, the extended family members are excluded. This is not so in Nigeria and many parts of Africa. What should be the relationship between a man, his wife and their in-laws? It should be cordial. However, the experiences of many people built from first-hand interactions, plus verbal and written reports of others, have proved that some relationships could be far from being cordial. As Christians we are to seek peace and pursue peace(Psalms 34:14). That means we should do everything within our God-given abilities to be at peace within ourselves individually and between ourselves and other persons. In the Epistle to the Hebrews it is written: Follow peace with everyone and holiness without which no person would see the Lord(Hebrews 12:14).
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife(united with her and cleave together)and become one flesh[Genesis 2:24]. – And the woman too. There is nowhere in the Bible where permission is given to the woman to remain with her father and mother after getting married. Does that imply a break up with one’s parents and siblings or cousins? Not at all. It is the drawing up of boundaries and the recognition of such boundaries by all the parties involved. It is the giving of respect and honour to the rights and independence of the new couple as another unit created by God for companionship, for pure and holy mutual sexual pleasure and fulfillment; and for procreation and the raising up of disciplined children.
We see the examples of Moses relating well with his father-in-law. Jethro counselled Moses in administration when he was over working himself. Thus he was able to delegate part of his duties and work more efficiently. Jethro earlier on brought Moses’ wife Zipporah and their two sons whom Moses had left behind when he went to meet Pharaoh. The relationship between Ruth and her mother-in-law, Naomi, was very cordial. If Naomi had been nosy and critical or unfriendly, that responsible, loving and highly respected daughter-in-law of hers would never have opted to leave her homeland of Moab for Israel; more so after their bereavements. She chose to remain with her mother-in-law after her father-in-law and later her own husband have died. She was a strong and faithful supporter and source of comfort. She got rewarded with a loving husband in the end. In fact both King David and our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ were in her lineage!
Examples also abound in this generation. There is the example of initial misunderstandings between the writer’s mother and his wife. These were later resolved to the extent that the two women became friends and confidants till the old woman died. During the period of misunderstanding, the writer stood his ground and protected his wife without being disrespectful to his mother. We have seen other examples where the husband or the wife chose to be rude to elders, whilst protecting their spouses. That is not proper.
Writing under the topic ‘The Expected’ and ‘The Unexpected’ in our marriage journey; and making references to parents-in-law, Drs. Thomas and Agnes Odejide wrote in their book
40 YEARS AFTER I SAID
I do
, published by Jesus Joy Publishing, 2011; pages 33-34
:
-my father died in 1990 at the age of 75. We did not regard his ‘home call’ as a tragedy even though we would have wished he had lived longer. It was expected that we would survive him so we celebrated his life during the burial ceremony. My mother followed about a decade later in 2000; she was 80 years old. My mother-in-law followed in 2001; she was over 80 years old. My father-in-law was the last to pass on in 2005 at the age of over a hundred years! We felt happy at the ‘home callings’ of our parents at very ripe ages We were particularly happy that God gave us the opportunity to take care of them. Although none of them lived with us permanently, we were not far from them and our home was always open to them. To God be the glory.
That is another example of honouring our in-laws as well as keeping necessary boundaries.
We cannot afford to lose our focus. God and posterity depend on us. The marriage institution must not be toyed with. Therefore those whom God has joined together, let no man; let no woman, let no legal, social, cultural or governmental policy or establishment toy with nor put asunder! Amen.
AgapeFocus 
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